Candidate mixes up campus intoxication, campus indoctrination, still wins

We enjoy a good news hoax as much as anyone, so we were amused last night to hear that Rick “Long-Shot” Santorum had just won 3 Republican races. We had him figured as out-of-contention due to his extreme views. But news stories (these are not hoaxes) say he actually did win in Colorado, Missouri and Minnesota. (Oh, Minnesota, you’re getting scary, but fortunately we still have the axe.)

We thought Santorum had taken himself out of contention by opposing all birth control.

“Many of the Christian faith have said, well, that’s okay, contraception is okay. It’s not okay. It’s a license to do things in a sexual realm that is counter to how things are supposed to be.”

We figured he’d gone over the edge in his views on rape pregnancies

“… I think the right approach is to accept this horribly created — in the sense of rape — but nevertheless a gift in a very broken way, the gift of human life, and accept what God has given to you.”

And then he explained why American universities are so very dangerous (hint: indoctrination)

It’s no wonder President Obama wants every kid to go college.  The indoctrination that occurs in American universities is one of the keys to the left holding and maintaining power in America. And it is indoctrination.”

We thought surely this level of zaniness would be disqualifying. Surely in Minnesota there are college students (“children” Santorum calls them) who would disabuse their Republican parents of this indoctrination nonsense.

Surely there are Republican voters in Missouri who themselves attended non-Bible-based universities, and who benefitted greatly, and who favor higher education, just like normal people.

Surely there are information systems like printed posters, telegraph and pony express to keep folks in Colorado up-to-date  There must be.

And yet the Republican base never ceases to amaze. And/or frighten.